First let's examine the following sentences
"Our relationship isn't working"
"Our relationship is going downhill"
"Our marriage isn't working"
"I am in an unhappy marriage"
"There is no communication in our relationship."
'Relationship', 'marriage' and 'communication' are process nouns called nominalizations. When a noun cannot be put in a wheelbarrow, it is called a nominalization. Nominalizations are abstract and thus give the impression that that nothing can be done about them.
To turn around a nominalization, you have to turn the process noun into a verb. Doing so enables you to phrase the question in such a way so that you can be more proactive in finding a solution.
"Our relationship isn't working"
"What is it about the way we are relating that is causing trouble?" "How would you like to relate?"
"Our relationship is going downhill"
"How exactly are we relating differently and how is that not as good as before?"
"Our marriage isn't working"
"What is it about the way we are being married that is causing trouble?" "How would you like to be married?"
"I am in an unhappy marriage"
"How exactly are we unhappily married? "How exactly would you like to be happily married?"
"There is no communication in our relationship."
"How exactly are we unable to communicate?" "How exactly would you like to communicate?"
Credit:
Meta Models of NLP