Is repairing a sexless marriage possible?

by Dr. Andrew D. Atwood, LMFT

There is no back-or-white answer to this question. The best way to ask the question is like this: “What is the probability that my sexless marriage, with its own specific challenges, can be repaired?”

You aren’t going to know the answer until after you do some good work at repairing your sexless marriage. I am being as honest right now as I can be. I can’t tell you what the probability is for change in your relationship. But I can tell you something of what you ought to do to see what the probability for change actually is.

For you to find out you will have to work at uncovering the real problems, and then you will have to work to address the real problems.

Obviously, the more you understand, the better off you will be. The better you get at handling your anxiety about dealing with the tough stuff, the better off you will be. The more you can adapt and change, the better off you will be.

As you dig into the real issues you will have to look at 5 Challenging Areas.

First, what biological problems might be impacting you, your partner, and thus your relationship?

Second, what relationship problems might be getting in the way of enjoying sex together?

Third, what particular cultural issues about “right” and “wrong” might be blocking you?

Fourth, what personal issues, what struggles with the way you think or feel, are keeping you stuck?

Fifth, what spiritual and/or energetic issues might be sapping you from the ability to relax and free-fall into a relationship of bliss?

So let me say it again, but in a different way. There is some probability that you can change your sexless marriage, but you won’t know how high the probability is until you dig deeper into the changes you will have to make.

People very often don’t do the work for fear that they will discover that it will take a lot of work, and a lot of hard work.

There is hope, always. Tools and resources for doing the work that is required can be found atHopeful Solutions for a Sexless Marriage.

There is always hope.

And if nothing can be changed… hope will always remain. Life can be better, one way or another.

Hopeful Solutions for a Sexless Marriage